esp8266_milight_hub VS deconz-rest-plugin

So, I have a few proprietary RF smart lights all around the house. I control these using an ESP project I found in Home Assistant. The problem I'm running into is kids turning off the lights from the switches. I figured the solution would be running relay switches for the smart lights since I want to install some for the dumb lights either way. I read up somewhere that you can run some relays in something called decoupled/detached mode, which allows them to send their state to home assistant, which can toggle the smart bulb.

Using this hub, they work well for controlling WLED (or non WLED) lights, but do take a bit of configuring getting all the buttons configured.

Alternatively, you can DIY a MiLight hub that connects to HA via MQTT, and use any of the MiBoxer/MiLight remotes if they fit your needs.

The easy option is to just get a Zwave or Zigbee remote. With a hub running Zigbee2MQTT or Zwave2MQTT, you can translate the button presses to MQTT and trigger your Tasmota devices. Alternatively, you could set up a Milight hub (which also translates button presses to MQTT topics) and use any of the commercially available Milight remotes as inputs.

The controller puck uses a 2.4GHz RF signal to control the light. I'm just guessing, but I would imagine you should be able to pick up the RF signal from a Milight hub like this. (I use a few Milight RF remotes connected to a DIY hub to control lights through HA.)

(These do require a 2.4GHz RF gateway. You can buy the standalone gateway, build your own, or buy a premade version.)

Anyone have any suggestions? I would prefer Zwave or 433MHz RF based (I have dongles for both attached to my HA box), but open to Wifi or Zigbee for the right solution. Anything cloud based is a hard pass. Same with BT, unless there is a cheap hub, or something I can DIY. (I already have a few ESP32 BT proxies running Tasmota or ESPHome.) IR is less than ideal due to line-of-sight restrictions. I was thinking about setting up this on an ESP8266, paired with one of these Milight remotes, but before putting in an AliExpress order and waiting weeks for delivery, does anybody have any other suggestions? Would this or this work with my 433MHz SDR running RTL_433? The giant antennas were a little off-putting.

I also looked at milight hub with an esp board.

If someone could specifically confirm/deny that the Gledopto bridge works with White bulbs would be great. People have created custom controllers for the White bulbs/remotes (e.g., here) - so I assume the protocol is known or the same.

Before binning off the Milight controller perhaps try this open source hub: https://github.com/sidoh/esp8266_milight_hub

You could try putting in an issue here: https://github.com/dresden-elektronik/deconz-rest-plugin/issues

I'm pretty sure it's supported by deCONZ. If I interpret this github issue correctly, it seems that support is included: https://github.com/dresden-elektronik/deconz-rest-plugin/issues/3827

The Aqara ones I use have configurable sensitivity.

They are newer, yes. But other than that, The Conbee can have 512 devices (changed in 2.14.4: https://github.com/dresden-elektronik/deconz-rest-plugin/releases/tag/v2.12.4-beta) opposed to the sonoff : https://notenoughtech.com/home-automation/sonoff-zigbee-3-0-usb-dongle-plus/ which seems to have a 200 device limit.

Not sure about the other items you list -- if they support Zigbee, they'll probably pair just fine. Here's a page where you can see what devices are compatible with the ConBee: https://github.com/dresden-elektronik/deconz-rest-plugin/wiki/Supported-Devices