TourGuide VS garbage-collector

Set up and use KoLMafia. It will help you automate a lot of stuff, like casting buffs when they get low between adventures or finding the best combination of gear to optimize a particular stat, saving you a lot of clicking. You can also outfit it with scripts like the TourGuide which will provide you with a running to-do list for your current ascension.

One script called "TourGuide" will give you reminders of what to do at any given time.

6 months? Have you tried doing quests? Or why is it taking that long? I don't think you need any special guide to not spend 6 months on an ascension in addition to just the wiki, but you could install https://github.com/loathers/TourGuide or even just check https://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/User:AstronautGuy/Ascension_Quests_Breakdown

KoLMafia is a pretty nice client to help you play the game, new player or not. In it, you can utilize a script like TourGuide which will help you through each of the quests (though it might display a lot of extra information overload for you at the start, so keep that in mind)

Fun content unlockers, or have a look into garbo You could do some quick ascensions to perm skills, use that meat for tickets and +meat items and farm some meat.

Check https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/19BvfkftgcgBHDVqllMRaCPvoGeys0tSke51VBH2bjiw/edit#gid=217654304 (linked from https://github.com/Loathing-Associates-Scripting-Society/garbage-collector/blob/main/ITEMS.md) and the notes there.

We run garbo.

You should use garbo for this.

Oh and for meatfarming if you're not using garbo then do yourself a favour and set yourself up for it.

For the post-prism farming, Garbo is the go-to, for those who are unfamiliar. The fine folks at LASS made and maintain that monster.

The recent grimoirization of garbo's daily tasks will make this either easier or harder to read.

But... if you already use mafia, why not use garbo too?

If you aren't opposed to using a script, garbo is really really good at optimizing for barf mountain. It has a fairly complex diet calculator built into it, and supports lots of different modes for running. I am dedicated to farming fully, and my account has nearly every possible shiny, and I ascend twice a day, but I usually net about 10-12m a day across items and meat.